That's What Girls Do
by Keira Sawyer
Summary: One shot. Food fight. Evil minds. hard ons. Naughty moments. AH. Canon couples. Deliciously hot. Lemon. according to my reviewers: funny.


BPOV

We were all in the kitchen whipping up desserts when all of a sudden, I felt something hit me in the back of the neck. I reached back with my hand to find a dollop of whipped cream. I spun around to glare at the not so innocent face of Emmett. He mouthed oops. I grabbed a piece of fruit that I was cutting and pelted it at him, only he ducked and I got Jasper instead. He looked down at his strawberry-stained white t-shirt and then raised his gaze at me. Before I knew what had happened, he dipped his hand into the bowl of chocolate and flung his fingers in our direction. He splattered both Rosalie and Alice. They weren't too happy when their designer outfits had been sullied. They snatched handfuls of cake and launched it at the boys. Alice hit Emmett and Rose hit Edward.

Someone yelled, "food fight!" as we broke into an all out war. We were running out of ammo quickly and ours weren't as messy as the boys'. When the girls and I ran out of food to throw, we backed slowly away from the boys' gleaming eyes. I had to think quick. I looked over at Alice and winked.

"Alice, you're so messy. Here let me help you clean up." I said as I licked the side of her face. "Mmm, the chocolate tastes so much better on you."

The guys had stopped dead in their tracks, with food still in hand. I smirked and Alice played along.

"Rose, your shirt is ruined!" Alice then proceeded to lick Rosalie's chest, earning an audible groan from the boys.

"Bella, look at your hands!" I looked at my food drenched fingers and Rose took my index finger into her mouth, sucking off all the fruit juices. I heard some grunts and shuffling across from us.

We gradually advanced on the frozen figures of our boyfriends and lightly touched their arms before ramming their food-filled palms into their faces. I heard a chuckle from behind them followed by an angry voice.

"Edward Anthony, Jasper Whitlock, and Emmett McCarty Cullen, what in God's name is going on in my kitchen?!" Esme screeched.

They guys turned around slowly to face the wrath of their mother, tents pitched.

"Daddy, the boys were being mean to us and started chucking food at us!" Alice pouted. Rosalie and I nodded and looked hurt.

"Boys, apologize to the girls and clean this mess up before your mother does something drastic."

"We're sorry." They said unanimously to us and Esme.

"Girls, why don't you clean yourselves up in my bathroom. It should be big enough for you all." Esme offered before she and Carlisle left.

"Come on girls. Let's go shower!" Alice squealed.

"Bella, will you wash my back?" Rosalie said seductively.

"Only if Alice gets my legs." I replied.

"Who's going to wash me?" Alice asked.

"Rose and I will both help you."

"Why don't we all share the shower? It's big enough and we'll save time and water." Alice suggested.

The guys' jaws were hitting the floor and their eyes were glazed over with lust. We skipped merrily to the downstairs bathroom.

EPOV

"Why do we get stuck with the cleanup?" Emmett complained.

"Because Alice has Carlisle wrapped around her little finger." I responded.

"It's just as much their fault. It's not fair." Jasper whined.

Jasper and I were busying ourselves with wiping down the counters and cabinets, while Emmett picked up the floor.

"Did you hear something?" Emmett asked.

"No, now get back to work. Esme looked like she was going to have a cow." Jasper stated.

"Hold on, let me check it out first." Emmett replied.

He walked in the direction that he apparently heard the sound coming from and I couldn't help but join him. Then I heard it. It was a muffled moan. I couldn't tell who it came from, but that didn't stop me from getting aroused. Jasper had joined us by now and we stealthily crept closer to the sounds of pleasure.

"Ohhh!!!!"

"Unnn!!!!"

"Ahhh!!!"

We heard animalistic sounds coming from the bathroom.

BPOV

"Let's play with the boys a little more." I suggested.

"What'd you have in mind?" Rosalie asked.

"We take a shower together like we said we would and then make sexual sounds."

"You're brilliant, Bella! It'll drive them crazy!"

"Do you think they'll hear us?"

"I'm sure Emmett will be the first to catch wind of it." Rose assured us.

"Let the torment begin."

We washed each other off and let out loud sensual moans.

"I think I heard the door knob turning." Rose whispered.

"Keep at it."

We panted and called each other's names in ecstasy. I wondered how hard the boys were by now.

EPOV

"Emmet, what do you think you're doing?!" He was reaching for the door handle.

"I just want to hear them better." He shrugged.

"We're going to get caught if you keep that up." Jasper whisper yelled.

Just then, we heard the water turn off and some wet splattering feet touch the tile. The girls were giggling and we pressed our ears against the door, listening intently. The door suddenly opened and we toppled to the floor. The girls screamed.

"What's going on?" Esme called as she neared the bathroom.

We were scrambling to get up, but were too late.

"Boys! Were you peeping on the girls? I thought I raised gentleman. Go to your rooms this instant!" She demanded.

Before my dick could explode at the sight of the three girls clad in only towels, I hustled upstairs with my brothers close behind.

BPOV

"We got them good." I said.

We high-fived each other and wrapped ourselves in robes. We scampered upstairs to get dressed.

"I have another idea for the boys." Alice said as she darted into her closet. She came back with very classy, yet alluring lingerie.

"Alice, they're going to spontaneously combust!"

"I know!" She said excitedly.

"Hey, how about a good ol' pillow fight?"

"In only our underwear." Rose added.

We put on our "outfits" if you could even call them that and proceeded to pummel each other with feather pillows, successfully sending pillows flying everywhere.

EPOV

I was holed up in my room when Emmett and Jasper burst through.

"Why are you here?"

"Want to see what the girls are up to?" Emmett asked.

I had nothing better to do and agreed. We made our way to Alice's room and cracked the door. We could hear heavy breathing and gleeful giggles. We made a totem pole to get a good vantage point. My cock was throbbing with need when I saw them all in skimpy lingerie chasing each other and whacking soft pillows, causing feathers to cover them and their surroundings. Everyone groaned simultaneously. The girls stopped. They must have heard us. Before we could sneak away, they spoke.

"Come in, boys." They said in come hither voices.

We looked at each other and tried to contain ourselves before entering.

"So are you guys truly sorry for what you did?" Rosalie asked.

"Uh huh" was all we could come up with.

"Girls, I think we should forgive them." Alice said.

"Go back to your rooms and we'll join you soon." Bella waved us off.

We complied.

BPOV

"So you ready for the last part of our revenge?" I asked once the guys left in their stupor.

"We're totally going to have hot sex." Rosalie smirked.

"So what do we do?" Alice

"I say, when we cum, instead of calling out their names, we call out one of the other's. The boys won't know what to think."

"I'll call out Edward's name when Emmett screws me." Rosalie.

"I'll call out Emmett's, good thing we're adopted or this would sound so wrong." Alice shuddered.

"And I'll call out Jasper's when Edward makes love to me."

"They are going to freak out." Rose

"It's settle then. Let's get our men, girls!" Alice

"Chicks over dicks!" We said at the same time.

EPOV

Bella came to my room shortly after. "You were a very bad boy tonight, Mr. Cullen. I don't know how I should punish you." She purred.

I growled and de-robed her, revealing that sexy blue number I saw earlier.

"Should I make you pleasure me or should I make you squirm?" She pondered out loud.

"Both." I breathed.

"You were extremely naughty." She considered.

We ravished each other's mouths. I lifted Bella so that her mouth could attack mine more readily. She took the chance to wrap her legs around my waist. I maneuvered my way back to my bed and placed her gently down on top of my covers. She undressed me and flipped us over.

She took both of my wrists and placed them above my head. "You are not to move your hands from this spot. You can't touch me while I punish you. Understand?"

I nodded breathlessly at the dominating Bella in front of me. She slowly slid her hands down my forearms to my biceps where she squeezed both before kissing them. She proceeded to kiss every part of my face, lingering on my lips. She kissed across my jaw line and down my neck to my chest. She swirled her tongue and nipped at my nipples before continuing her path to the promise land. She stuck her tongue in my belly button and I writhed underneath her. She smiled, seeing me squirm. She licked the crease of my v line, but skipped over the parts I wanted her mouth most. She sucked on my big toe and brushed her lips up my legs. She kneaded my thighs, inching closer and closer to my erection. I thought I was going to have a hard on for the rest of eternity after the tonight's events. My cock twitched in anticipation and locked my hands behind my head to keep them from slamming her head onto my engorged dick.

I was starting to lose hope when she paused her movements. I was quickly reassured when I saw her lick her lips. I bucked my hips forward, urging her to continue. She happily obliged and enveloped me into her hot little mouth. I could have cum immediately, but fought against it so I could savor the feeling of her licking and pumping. She fondled my balls and whatever part she couldn't fit in her mouth. I couldn't last any longer. I let out a loud yell mixing Bella's name in there as I had my most violent orgasm ever. I struggled to catch my breath and come back from my high.

"Bella, that was the best blowjob I've ever had in my life." I said.

She brushed off her shoulder like a pimp and said, "that's how I do."

I chuckled at her attempt at being gangster. I was still recovering, so I pleasured Bella with my mouth before continuing to the main event. She rode out her orgasm as I held on to her, keeping her from slipping from reality. When she had settled down, I positioned myself at her entrance and thrusted into her with a satisfied grunt. We worked together and quickly came at the same time. I called out her name, but my ears must have failed me, when I didn't hear my name leaving her luscious lips, but Jasper's. What the heck? Was she and Jasper doing it behind my back? Bella would never do that to me and Jasper was my brother! What was going on here?!

BPOV

After Edward made me cum, we made love and I concentrated on the plan. Before I lost all coherency, I called out Jasper's name. Edward froze as he realized whose name I cried out. He held a look of shock and anger on his face.

"Oh my gosh, Edward. I'm so sorry." I swiftly got up and put on my robe before bolting out the door. I had to get away before I laughed uncontrollably. I ran to Alice's room to find Rose and Alice already there, laughing their butts off. I joined them and we pounded fists.

"I take it things went well?"

They nodded. "Let's get some sleep. They're probably too stunned to do anything but rest on it."

Alice gave me a nightgown and we all climbed into her gigantic bed. I woke, hearing shouts and scuffling. It sounded like there was a fight. I shook Rose and Alice awake and we poked our heads outside our door.

EPOV

I woke up to an angry Emmett and Jasper. "What's going on?"

"I think you know the answer to that." Emmett seethed.

Last night came back to me in a flash. I looked at Jasper angrily, who looked at Emmett the same way. It was like a circle of hate.

"Rose said your name last night." Emmett.

"Funny, Alice said yours, Emmett." Jasper.

"That's strange, Bella said yours, Jasper."

"Have you been sleeping with my girl?" We all shouted.

Then we attacked each other. Jasper had Emmett in a headlock, while I was clawing at him. Emmett was swinging at me. We switched positions as we wrestled each other.

"Wait, stop!" Jasper said calmly.

Emmett and I let go of each other.

"Our girls all said the names of someone else last night, right?"

"Yeah, your point?" Em

"Well, I know I've never cheated on Alice and Em, you'd be stupid to cheat on Rose. Edward is too in love with Bella to cheat on her."

"So you're saying we're all innocent and the girls planned this?" I asked.

"Maybe they're still trying to get back at us for the food fight." Jazz

"Bros before hoes?" Emmett said crudely.

"Let's go confront them." I said.

BPOV

"Shoot! They're coming!" We ran back to the room and reassumed our sleeping positions, sexing them up a bit. Rosalie was spooning me and her arm was around my waist. Alice pressed her face into my breasts and her arm reached over to cup Rose's butt. I had my hand on Alice's thigh, inching up her nightie. Our legs were all tangled and our arms were around each other in a lover's embrace. I tried to hide my smile when I heard the door open and three gasps.

The alarm rang, causing us to jump. We all laughed and then looked at the boys. "What are you guys doing here?"

"We were going to ask you ladies something, but now we just want to join in the festivities." Emmett

The girls and I shared a glance. "So you guys figured it out?" Alice.

"You tricked us!" Edward.

"Payback's a bitch." Rose said bluntly.

"Look, we're sorry. You know we love you." Jasper said sincerely.

"Aww." We cooed.

"You're forgiven." I said.

**_AN: Review! Sorry I'm late with this update. I'll upload 2 stories okay? Check the prof._**


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